After an emergency gallbladder removal to start off 2022, I am left finding the joy in each little thing I can do the next day. Lifting a mug of hot tea, opening the fridge, doing my daughter's hair for school, sleeping in my own bed, laying on my back, etc. I found myself wasting time being in disbelief and mourning how strong and athletic I was a little over a week ago physically. I let myself cry to my hubby. But now I am choosing to release the thoughts about the past, as they do not serve me in healing for tomorrow and beyond. Instead, I choose to focus on every positive change that comes along now. And when I'm faced with something I can't do yet (play SPIT with the family - card game that involves speed and force), I choose to make it a goal for the future so I can relish in it when I get to. I am choosing to spend my time watching my family laugh and learn how to play together for now. I choose to sit and watch my husband and kids grow together making meals that I probably would have made alone. There are plenty struggles in parenting teens that I feel I'm leaving my husband hanging, but there are plenty of growth moments and opportunities. Out of dark and hard always comes light and opportunity - if you are open, looking, and willing. I'm looking at this as my mind, body, and soul's reset. I could choose to look at this saying what a crappy start to 2022 (I mean, come on, I'm human), but I'm choosing to look at the positives gained from this experience. I feel like so often we look at what life does to/ gives us, but how about we look at how we can respond to what comes our way is truly the test. I believe that is a true judge of character. It is okay to cry, be angry, etc, but are you going to sit and complain about what happen - perseverate? Or are you going to look around your situation and choose to rise up with what you been given? My son so often asks me how I can be so positive all the time and even mocked me calling me 'Ms. Sunshine', and I respond that that is the only way I know. Can you imagine life where you only looked at what you don't have? What you can't do? I don't want that life for sure. I'm looking at this saying maybe I was getting in a rut with my workout. Now, I am trying to incorporate some gentle side bending and rotation without pain. I'm thinking maybe more consistent yoga and meditation should be a part of my plan (though. I am 40, and maybe my body is telling me my exercise needs to be more well rounded and not so much pounding and hard core. I realize just how much I love the feeling of being strong. I have always incorporated movement into my life. But now I realize that I don't know how much I ever made time to be still. Life has a way of making one feel guilty if you aren't moving a thousand miles per minute - I know I fell into that. If I wasn't constantly moving/ cooking/ baking/ achieving, I was slacking. Still time to just be, meditate, read, journal, nap can be just what the mind, body, and soul ordered. Note to self to remember this when I'm back in action and joining the rest of the world. Intention: I choose to find the positive. Find time to be still. Appreciate what you can do.
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